ex's!!!!!!!

[Chandra Amaya]

I am so mad that I cannot see straight. My ex has not seen his kids in over three years. My youngest son (who is turning 9 on april 29th) told me that his father told him that he cannot trust me because i never told him that he is adopted. My son was not adopted. He almost died when he was born! He was an emergency c-section because the cord was around his neck and his heart rate dropped. This child cried his eyes out. Why would his father say such a thing to him? I know he is a drug addict and mad because i left him and found someone I am happy with now, but I just can't understand this. My oldest daughter confirmed that her dad did tell Sebastian this.
He tried to get me to give Sebastian up for adoption or have an abortion. When they took us to do the ememrgency c-section my ex who I was still married to at the time decided he was hungry and went to eat while I went to surgery.
He contacted me a couple of weeks ago wanting to see "his kids". I did not want him to because he breaks their hearts by promising to come back and not showing up. I thought about allowing him supervised visitation at DCS, but after hearing that he told my son this, i do not ever want him around them. Am i overeacting? wrong to not want him around at all? Anyone have any insight on why he would say this to my son? Please help, before i scream!

[Janet]

That was pretty cruel for him to do such a thing. I'm sorry your son had to hear such a blantant lie and from his father. Maybe you can see if he will forfeit his parental right if not...haul his butt to court for all he owes you.

[judy]

Dear Traci,

I had similar issues with Jessie's father. I could fill a book up with stories about that loser. He has told Jessie the most awful things over the years. She finally wrote to him when she was 11, after Joel and I began living together and told him that he wasn't her father anymore.

She has gone back and forth with him over the years. She starts to feel guilty, calls him so that if he dies, she'll have no regrets, he ALWAYS screws up and then she stops talking to him. He never came to see her when she was in the hospital for 3 months and then diagnosed with MS. She hasn't spoken to him since.

I keep out of it at this point. When she was younger, I only sent her to L.A. with his Mom. She went for about 6 weeks once a year. I always told her that there are some people who you're better off walking away from, and that he's one of them.

He's an alcoholic now so I would imagine he's getting payback. Never forget that you never have to get revenge. God takes care of these things for you. I've seen it happen over and over again.

Your children are young. Maybe very short, supervised visits once in a while.
He won't come around for long. He doesn't sound like the type who wants to really be a father. He probably got a bug up his ass and is taking it out on you.

I'm sorry you're going through this. I know how upsetting it can be when you're trying to protect your children from their own father.

[Marilyn]

Oh, Traci, that is horrible!!! I've never been through anything like that, but I agree with Judy on her insight into your Ex. The children are better off without him, if that is how he is going to act. What he is showing them is not love, not a good parental example. It doesn't sound like he has anything good to teach them. I'd keep them away as much as possible.

[Marilyn]

Oh, Traci, that is horrible!!! I've never been through anything like that, but I agree with Judy on her insight into your Ex. The children are better off without him, if that is how he is going to act. What he is showing them is not love, not a good parental example. It doesn't sound like he has anything good to teach them. I'd keep them away as much as possible.

[Mandy]

Thats freaking cruel of him!
Shows you what kind of person he is, says more about him, and where he "came" from.
The kids are definatly better off without him in their life.
Give your little boy big hugs from us!

[Gina]

Traci I agree with all the above posts, he doen't derserve to see them and if you permit vistations someone should be with him. He is poisoning their minds.. The children don't need him in their lives he is confusing them. I wish you luck for this is a hard situation...

[AngieDoogles]

Traci, I think he's proved over and over again that he doesn't deserve to be in their lives. He has caused them nothing but pain. You know this. Those kids are better off without him!

[DianaB]

Traci, if there's any way to prevent this man from seeing your kids then I would do it, otherwise I would definitely have supervised visitation. You don't need him making accusations and having your kids upset at you when you've done nothing wrong. He is just trying to cause trouble for you and the kids. How cruel that he would tell your son that he is adopted when he's not! Make sure that you document everything that he says and does and the date in case you have to go to court over anything. You'll find that just a simple thing like writing down things can help so much if you ever need legal help.